Author: Christopher Kelly
-
The dark story behind the laughter is a gut punch at redemption. From the late 1990s through 2010, Dane Cook was everywhere. Having lived through that era, I can attest to his omnipresence: he was on TV, in movies, and his comedy CDs were in half my friends’ collections. He was an absolute juggernaut. If…
-
It’s Jason Statham on a boat. Jason Statham is a national treasure. In a modern cinematic wasteland where cheesy one-liners, greased-up biceps, and absurdly over-the-top brawl scenes have mostly gone the way of the dodo, J-Stats is still out here cranking out flick after flick well into his late 50s. It’s pretty much always the…
-
It’s dog shi … well you get it. Man, do I ever hate talking during a movie. Don’t get me wrong—there is a night-and-day difference between being in a rowdy, packed crowd for a midnight cult screening of The Room or The Rocky Horror Picture Show and trying to watch a new flick. I was…
-
A great way to cool off on a hot summer day. Everyone, lend me your ears. It’s about time we all sat down and talked about films and what to expect from them. Especially when you’re watching one from an established writer/director. What I’m about to say may shock and disturb some of you, but…
-
This movie will make you get up, up and away from your theater. It’s official: Superhero fatigue is here. While critics have been pointing at 2019’s Avengers: Endgame as the turning point, the mass audience has been checking out since the 2022 Black Adam debacle. I never bought into the formula to begin with; it’s…
-
Visually amazing, no depth. Steven Spielberg is easily one of the most (if not the most) recognizable names in Hollywood history. Almost anyone can name one of his movies, and I would be willing to bet a large sum of money that for at least two generations everyone can say one of his movies that…
-
Wayans played it too safe. Look, I’ll be the first to admit it: I am a wordy guy. I love to talk, I love to dive deep into the weeds of cinema, and I especially love it when a movie gives me something—anything—to chew on. But after sitting through Scary MoVIe, I’m left with a…
-
It’s head splitting, blood drenched fun! Check it out! Way back in 1992 the world was clobbered with one of the most violent video games of all time: Mortal Kombat. The ultra-violent, parent-angering, two person fighter was all the rage. With hitt a few buttons, you could throw a hook at your opponent, yell “GET…
-
See it ASAP! It’s a blast! Finally! A movie for me! It’s been a few weeks since I’ve made it to the theaters to review anything. With the new house, building my new studio (by myself mainly. What? You didn’t think I knew how to use my hands?), I had to put things on hold.…
-
Don’t be a Grinch: It’s a blast! It’s a slasher that’s a remake of a slasher from 40 years ago that was one of the most protested movies in history due to its depiction of Santa Claus as a killer. The original Silent Night Deadly Night is jam packed with cult classic lines shouted like…